The post-menopause experience can be stressful and painful for both women and their partners. This is because of the impact on their everyday life and, most especially, their sexual participation. Sexual urge and participation seem to be the most affected area when post-menopause is considered. While this is the reality, there are ways to salvage the situation and get wives as sexually excited as they used to be before menopause.
There is a need to understand what menopause is, how it affects the body, and the direct link to the sexuality of women. If we understand these things, we will have an idea of what it means for women to experience menopause and the aftermath effect on their relationship with their husbands. And since it is a natural phenomenon that will occur at some point, the best is to prepare for it and be equipped with the right knowledge.
What Is Menopause?
There are many ways to define menopause, depending on how you view it. The simple meaning is the cessation of menstruation signaled by some signs, which include but are not limited to vaginal dryness, mood swing, vaginal itching, difficulty sleeping, irritability, night sweats, etc. It is a natural process that occurs in all women’s lives, usually before age 50. However, it has been observed to come between 45 and 55 for most women.
The advent of menopause for any woman signals that such a woman has stopped secreting hormones that power menstruation for 12 consecutive months. The lack of these hormones will ultimately lead to bodily changes and feelings as the body tries to find balance again in the new normal. These reactions will be evident in both the woman’s internal and external body workings.
Since our focus is on lovemaking as it pertains to menopause, it is pertinent for us to establish their relationship. However, we won’t be able to do that until we understand the menopause process and how each level of the process impacts the woman’s body. A woman’s body is great, and it houses lots of mysteries that uphold sexual pleasure for both men and women. But, as great as this is, menopause can mess it up, turning sexual excitement into frustrations.
Perimenopause is a period when women transition into menopause. It comprises a series of events like irregular flow, erratic ovulation, lengthening of the menstrual cycle, etc. The changes in hormonal levels are the cause of the changes. This is the first step for every woman before menopause.
This period is usually between two and ten years. Women would release fewer eggs within this period, have shorter periods, and irregular periods, and retain less estrogen. It is nothing more than a time when a woman’s ovary stops working gradually so that they become less fertile. This will precede menopause itself.
In menopause, some experience in perimenopause becomes more pronounced. Many of the symptoms come and go in perimenopause, but in menopause, it is the phase to feel it. So, many women confuse perimenopause with menopause, but please note that menopause only comes into the picture when you have not experienced a period for at least twelve months consecutively.
At menopause, a woman can no longer get pregnant. However, a woman can still get pregnant in perimenopause because the menstrual cycle is not absent but irregular. Here the body is adjusting to the hormonal changes, and the woman is already balancing her living with the new normal because it is no longer fluctuating as it is in perimenopause.
At this stage, you have entered and passed menopause. Your body is already balanced with the changes. The fluctuating hormones no longer fluctuate. However, you need to watch the decreased hormones and get help to increase them medically. For instance, decreased estrogen may enhance coronary artery disease. That is one of the reasons you should seek medical help.
8 Truths About Sex After Menopause
Sex after menopause is possible and achievable, but keep in mind that it will not be the same as a decade ago. So, what do you need to know about what the sex will look like or turn to after menopause? Here are 8 truths you need to hold firm about sex after menopause.
- Women may become less sexually aroused
Once perimenopause starts, the woman’s sexual urge takes a new turn which may not favor sexual interaction. At first, it will fluctuate and then later decrease. The interesting thing is that the woman won’t feel bad about this.
- Sex may become painful
During menopause, sex may become painful because of the dryness of the vagina. This is caused by low estrogen, which affects blood flow to the vagina. This will, in turn, cause little or no vagina lubrication making it dry and not so good for pleasurable sex.
- Menopause is inevitable
Menopause is a natural process every woman will encounter as they age. It comes with lots of changes too. It can neither be prevented nor cured, but you can manage the aftermath.
- Sex will be undesirable
Because of the hormonal changes, sex may not be desirable. If your partner is going through menopause, you need to understand that the change makes her less concerned about sex. Also, understand that it will take some work to get her where she used to be.
- The vagina changes
It is true that the vagina changes but not like it will become a new figure. The changes are internal and how it works but the more you engage in sex, the better it becomes as sex enhances blood flow to the vagina, making it great and responsive.
- Protection is still needed
While the fear of pregnancy may not be there anymore, you may need to have protected sex to prevent infection and other sexually transmitted diseases. This is key to living a healthy life. Maintain a healthy vagina.
- Definition of sex may change
As menopause changes the woman, one of the things that may change is the definition of sex. Sex for the woman may not necessarily mean penetration. It may mean caressing, intimate touch, etc. But, again, this is because of the loss of sexual desire.
- Menopause Is emotional
You may need to understand that menopause affects women emotionally. They wonder what their bodies turn to and if their partner will still find them attractive. As a partner, one great support is to love and accept them; you both are in it together.
How To Sexually Excite Women After Menopause
Sex is not entirely the same after menopause for the woman and her partner. It may come with some extra work to make the sex great, but it is achievable. This is the reason partners of menopausal women need to be adequately informed. Remember that it is a trying time for both of you.
The first point to begin is to create a mindset that your sex will be great. Make yourselves understand that you both are in this together. As far as sex is concerned, whether before menopause or after menopause, it is whatever you make it. If you think it won’t work well, it won’t, but all hands must be on deck if you are ready to make it work well.
You will be dealing with four obstacles to making your sex great again after menopause. However, you are in for a nice time once you can take care of these four enemies of great sex after menopause. These enemies are low libido, vagina dryness, pain during sex (Dyspareunia), and skin sensitivity reduction. Anything that can be done to outsmart these four things will make the sex great.
Since this is a new area you are treading, you will need to encourage your partner to constantly communicate with you as you go through sex. This is an important feature to make sex great for both of you. You need to know which body part is still doing the magic as you touch those parts to stimulate the urge and enjoyment.
You will need to spend quality time with foreplay. You may need to do a lot of stimulation from the nipples and other areas. You will need to be intentional about the foreplay to stimulate the sexual urge. This is where communication will be effective. As the foreplay goes on, the woman should be communicating the touch.
To engage your menopausal woman, you may need to engage with her clitoris with some lubricant. Rhythmic stroking on the clitoris for a few minutes with the tongue on the nipples can do a lot. It will gradually bring the woman to speed as the sex drive rises. At such a point, use the moment to tell the woman how great the body is and how much you are enjoying it. That will balance it psychologically.
Also, you need to employ lubricant to cater to vagina dryness. Vagina dryness will make sex painful and unexciting. With the help of lubricants, penetration will be easy and exciting for both partners. It is not a bad idea to use lubricants as some stigmatize it. The vagina needs to be wet to have great sex.
5 Exercises That Will Help Women Improve Sex Drive After Menopause
One would wonder what body exercise has to do with menopause and sex drive. It may interest you to know that there are touchpoints between these factors. Studies have shown the connections and how exercises influence sex drive, especially after menopause.
Studies have identified that sex drive increases in healthy women who exercise. This was attributed to enhanced sympathetic nervous system activities (SNS). Further studies also showed that exercises enhance the production of hormones, like releasing hormones that enhance sex drive.
Also, it may surprise you that obesity, diabetes, and hypertension may result from a lack of physical exercise. And these three are known to reduce sex drive or libido. Therefore, there is a strong connection between sex drive and physical exercise. It has even been an effective way to manage menopausal symptoms. So, in all, body exercise is good for postmenopausal women.
While exercises will help increase sex drive in women generally, this will be a great tool for women who have passed menopause. This will be an inexpensive way to get over the trauma of losing out sexually because of menopause. However, not all exercises would fit postmenopausal women because they are older. To avoid other issues, one must tread carefully. So, here are five exercises they can do to increase their sex drive;
Walking is a great exercise for women with postmenopausal experiences. It helps in reducing the effects of the symptoms and depression. These two are the major causes of sexual disinterest. Walking for 30 minutes per day is a good recipe for this cause.
Practicing Kegels is another great exercise to help improve sex drive and stamina after menopause. Kegel is done by intermittently holding your pee while urinating for a few seconds. Beyond improving your orgasm, Kegels help your bladder, uterus, and small intestine.
This is a nonpharmacological way to enhance your sexual drive. The practice of Ayurvedic yoga is believed to help in sexual problems. Some studies have identified yoga to be an effective solution for issues around sexual arousal, desire, orgasm, satisfaction, and lubrication.
This is the use of weights or obstacles to train for stamina and strength. This has been identified to boost libido. You can do that even in the house or gym. You will find strength training that will work well.
It is an excellent way to improve your sexual urge and participation if you can swim. Harvard studies have shown that swimming for 30 minutes three to four times a week will do the magic. It is also known to undo the weight gain during perimenopause.
5 Vitamins That Will Help Improve Your Postmenopausal Sex Drive
Postmenopause experience can be both psychological and emotional for women. In either case, you will agree with me that hormonal fluctuations and imbalance essentially cause it. Interestingly, these hormonal fluctuations and imbalances can be addressed with the appropriate intake of vitamins. To this end, we shall briefly look at five vitamins that can help with postmenopausal sex drive.
This is better referred to as the sex vitamin. It is responsible for pumping oxygen and blood to the sex drive areas. It is also known as the anti-aging agent that makes you look younger with energy. In addition, it boosts libido by regulating sex hormones for effective sexual drive and enjoyment. Vitamin E is readily available in foods like tomatoes, walnuts, and sweet potatoes.
You may not have heard that vitamin C also helps in generating sexual arousal. But more importantly, it helps to secrete sex hormones such as progesterone and estrogen. Vitamin C is such a complete help in this regard as it boosts the immune system too. Foods rich in vitamin C are strawberries, oranges, and kiwi.
This vitamin is highly important for women. It helps women with lots of things, including regulating sex hormones (estrogen, serotonin, testosterone, dopamine) and increasing libido in women. Foods with a supply of Vitamin B6 include Avocados, Pork, Banana, oats, and cottage cheese.
As far as orgasm is concerned, this is one of the vitamins to seek. This is because it improves orgasm and helps with blood flow. And blood flow to key sexual areas is important for sexual engagement and enjoyment. In addition, it works on the gland secreting the hormones, so it cannot be underrated. Foods that will contain vitamin B3 include liver, brown rice, Salmon, and peanuts.
One of the aftermath effects of menopause is the thinning of vagina walls. Vitamin D regulates cell growth and also helps with hormonal fluctuations. As hormonal fluctuation makes sex difficult in menopause, vitamin D can help alleviate the condition. Food rich in vitamin D includes fatty fish, beef liver, and red meat.
Please note that the foods listed as examples for each of the vitamins are not the only food rich in those vitamins. You may search for more examples. You need to be intentional about your nutrition at this stage and about enhancing better sexual participation. Your nutrition is essential too because you are what you eat.
Conclusively, the arrival of menopause and postmenopausal experience does not mean an end to sex drive and good sexual interaction with your partner. Instead, it means being creative with the knowledge of the new body system. So, sex can be great again if you acknowledge the new normal and flow with it with your partner.
Though you may not be concerned about pregnancy anymore, it is important to tread carefully with sex because of sexually transmitted diseases. So, it may be worth it to use condoms and maintain healthy living. So stay clean and encourage your partner to do the same to stay safe from sexually transmitted diseases and infections.